I've been dating a great, loving and caring woman for a year and a half. She's in her early thirties – eight years older than me – and works as a senior manager in a big company; she earns around ￡60,000pa, and her company provides a car and a city-centre flat. I am about to finish my PhD and my stipend is ￡14,000pa.

We're in love and think it's about time to move our relationship to the next level – which is moving in together. However, I feel that my girlfriend is stingy towards me. I'm the one who treats at posh restaurants and buys expensive gifts, and when we spoke about me moving into her flat she said that I'd have to pay the bills in return.

I'm finding it silly to mention such things, but they do annoy me. Am I shallow, greedy and opportunist? I understand her pay isn't supposed to be a perk of our relationship but I must admit that, deep inside, I feel that a better lifestyle out of it wouldn't go amiss.